You know how people write letters at christmas time that tell you how Aunt Betty's pig ate her canary and they McKensy twins joined the contortionist circus? We'll, I'm a dork, so I'll write a blog entry for anyone out there who checks in occassionally and wonders why I have apparently slowed down on me blogging.
First and foremost, my wife is pregnant with twins! Well, its a long story. Its not my fault, they aren't mine. Hey, now, they aren't hers either! They are her sister's. We're very excited to be able to help my (bro and sis) in-law to have what she and I are so lucky to have in my 2 year old son. ..and a 2 year old son can keep you on your toes as well. Now toss in my wife's medical residency and you might see what home life entails. A hell of a lot of fun, hella busy!
Work has gotten crazy. I usually have Fridays off but right now we have critical project schedules and I have to make up for lack of appropriate planning. I am very glad to have such a flexible job and I actually prefer when things are fast paced. Timing? I like having more free time in the summer but then I like driving a sports car. Our brand new luxury minivan is much more suitable. (yes, new van, traded in the turbo volvo wagon).
I am studying for MCSD certification. Since we dumped all our money in the van, I can't afford the practice tests and therefore have to read the books. Doug Turnure of Microsoft was very generous in providing me with study materials and I have two co workers dedicated to our study group. We're pretty senior developers yet we're finding a great value in reviewing some basic concepts and techniques. This weeks reading was a little much, a little dry. I'm far from finished.
A band is in the works. After 15 years of looking for musicians to play with, I found a group of guys who I can rock with. We're endeavoring on a original project with some covers thrown in for spice. I hope we might play out as soon as a couple months. I have some work to do to get my chops back! I have a trip to Wisco to get my amps back... I have to scrounge some money to buy some gear. Expesive habit.
Then there is home ownership. Oh how little I knew when I signed that mortgage! I have been trying to get grass to grow in the back yard. Its coming up but its an ongoing battle with the dog and his propensity to dig. He's received several beatings but he's a big, strong dog and I don't think he minds them. He's also up to 2 walks a day. That usually fends off misbehavior. He may have figured out the situation and is now in complete control. I/m not sure. He's whippin' my ass. Speaking of ass-whippage, our air conditioning is on the fritz. Again. The woman who sold us the house (and how I want to ruin her name but still have a little couth... OK? Judy) lied like a 10 dollar whore claiming to be a virgin when she told us the state of things in the house. In her defense, she might actually be that stupid that she thought the 12 year old furnace was actually 7 and the 10 year old air conditioning was brand new. She may have thought her crack smoking contractor knew how to do plumming correctly or that you can add a second story on a house for $30k... I doubt it. She seemed smart right up until I asked her whether she knew about the air conditioner. Oh well. We have spent nearly $2k on the HVAC already and have another $600 condensor looming in the very, very near future. Whew! feels good to get that off my chest.
After the grass comes in we need a deck or a patio and somewhere for tiny dude to play. We just decided on our five year plan to finish our attic and basement, build a deck, fix up anything needing repair, and then find a nice, old, 1920's brivk bungalow across the street to renovate. It reminds me of the Dukes of Hazzrd when boss Hog hypnotizes Beau into selling the General. He beats Luke in a archery challenge so they sell it. Then they go down to the junk yard and pick up a Charger. Beau says, "we can fix it up, paint it orange, weld the doors shut and pain an 01 on the side!" And Luke realizes he's been hypnotized, or he bangs his head, or something stupid... then they find boss Hog about to roll the General off a cliff... commercial break.. and then boss hog isabout to roll the general off the cliff but they save it and then jump it over a ravine and say yee haw. See, our house is a nice, old 1920's bungalow. However, its on a busy road. I would like to move 3 blocks over to a not so busy road. Same neighborhood, same house if possible. Just three blocks over.
The ironic thing is, I can't afford to spit right now, so I don't feel much pressure to get much of this stuff done. Rotting wood on the back of the house? so?! Fence falling down. Yep! Basement unusable? What of it?
I'm a 30's, working man with a beautiful wife and kid, a big, dumb dog, a house I can't afford, a mini van and a four door sedan, more projects then time, more ends then means, a hose, a rake, a shovel, a circular saw, a hippie bus parked out back, an office that doubles as storage, a job and a mother making me nuts, no idea how to do any of this and, despite it all, I still throw a guitar on my shoulder and try to be a rock star... heh. What am I? Typical american male.
However, when you step back, you will see only an amazing life. You will see the best wife and child anyone has ever been blessed with. I wish there were a word that could describe what it is to have unbelievable and unlikly good fortune thrust upon you such that a rudderless existence suddenly has meaning and importance. I wish I could express what it feels like to look around and see everything in bloom all around and realize, in an instant, that this is the magic that everyone is searching for and most give up on, and that you did nothing to make it happen except to receive it and make it grow. We don't have a word quite right in our language... purpose.
So I may not have had time to write, I may not have had words to add. But that might just be becuse, sometimes, words are too cheap for moment, or just as good unsaid.